Into Wardrobe

As nice as Under Armour is, the dress code for Twinkz mandates Speedos or other competition swim briefs be worn at all times. So off goes the Under Armour for some Speedo photos. This is Helix’s Sasha Peterson. With the Tumblr blog being rather PG-13ish, we figured we’d post a few more Speedoless shots here.

Read more "Into Wardrobe"

TWINKZ ILLUSTRATED HAS THIS SUIT, an Arena brief called the “Santamarias.” Who knows why it’s plural because we thought there was only one Santa Maria! We skipped ordering too many of these because we were already clearing out the entire Italian inventory of this white Adidas suit here and here.

Read more

THE MODEL SEEMS to be Arnau Salinas, wearing the same Turbo New Zealand water-polo suit that we have in wardrobe here at the Twinkz Illustrated Bulge Lab! The Lab also determined that his dick is pointed to the left and uncut. Unfortunately the photographer did not think to have his camera’s sensor cleaned. Look at all of the dust.

Speedos off at twinkz-deillustrated.tumblr.com
Track us at twinkz-illustrated.com

Read more

IT’S OUR LIFEGUARD after he changed out of his official Jacksonville Beach lifeguard suit from agonswim and into this Speedo.

Read more

twinkz-illustrated:

TWINKZ ILLUSTRATED HAS BEEN training this swimmer on proper beach attire – which means Speedo. But he thinks you’ll like what you see way too much, so he opts to tease instead. (He did model one of our new white Adidas suits from Italy recently, though.)

Read more

THIS SWIMMER KEEPS putting up with our photographers! It’s our fifth shoot. Except this time he’s wearing an ultra-rare white Adidas swim brief — so rare we could only find it in Italy! We have reports from overseas bulge analysts that it was also available at Adidas outlet stores in France.

Read more

OUR SWIMMER IN HIS white Adidas swim brief, ordered from Italy, since you can’t find them in the United States! For that matter, Twinkz Illustrated just about exhausted the entire Italian inventory by ordering about 12 of these. Read about the heroic mission we went on to find these suits here

Read more

This is a Twinkz Illustrated model and Helix model. Helix credit cropped. (And indeed he lix. Every one of their models lix! )

Read more

ANOTHER WATER-POLO GOALIE posing for our cameras. That Nike water-polo suit thankfully does not have the hideous seam down the ass crack that the Nike swim brief has.

Read more

Just got my first 100% nylon brief swimwear from AussieBum. They feel awesome wearing them as usual underwear. Any suggestion what brand to buy next? The white Turbo briefs look nice.

NYLON? TWINKZ ILLUSTRATED BRIEFLY interviewed AussieBum founder Sean Ashby recently about the state of this fucking-hot material. And here we give you more about it and what he said about its future. You’re choosing well when you choose nylon (especially what’s been known as nylon tricot for decades) as material for your swim briefs, running […]

Read more "Just got my first 100% nylon brief swimwear from AussieBum. They feel awesome wearing them as usual underwear. Any suggestion what brand to buy next? The white Turbo briefs look nice."

THIS WAS SHOT ON KODAK film. Our photographer and chief bulge analyst hastily opened the camera’s rear cover when it was time to change rolls and exposed the film to light without first rewinding it, thus damaging all of the shots. This is a cleaned-up result. Damage aside, any bulge analyst can still conclude that our swimmer keeps his plump cut dick pointed to the left. Were it not for the modern lycra Size 28 Speedo, you might think this was taken in 1962!

We had our digital camera with us, too. See a shot from it here.

Speedos off at twinkz-deillustrated.tumblr.com
Track us at twinkz-illustrated.com

Read more

THIS SEEMS TO BE A Puma compression boxer-brief, widely strewn throughout the U.S. now at discount stores like Ross and TJ Maxx. For that we censure this beach-goer: Only Speedos or other competition swim briefs are proper attire in most any setting, but especially this one. Our Bulge Lab analysts commend him for the black material and green stitching; we would order a suit from TruWest or Agon with that theme. And they commend him for the 11-inch circumcized downward-curved dick that twists about 28 degrees cockwise when stiff.

Speedos off at twinkz-deillustrated.tumblr.com
Track us at twinkz-illustrated.com

Read more

Twink size! Also new but slightly vintage. The first clue is the Speedo logo in all caps.

Read more

Vintage Speedo box. In this case, the former home to a GREEN SPEEDO! “Pull the suit up onto the body in stages,” the box says. What if your teammate wants to help?

Read more

BULGE LAB FINDINGS: Even though there’s no “crater” at the tip signifying foreskin, our technicians nonethless determined this swimmer is uncut. They’re saying 8 inches, slight downward curve when stiff. For a higher-quality pic, see this posting of the pic at the Nylon Speedo Authority’s site. (If you didn’t know, swim briefs used to be made out of nylon tricot and when you rubbed suits with other swimmers, the suits were so slick and lubey that you could squirt.)

Read more

Reposting this shot of our oceanic lovebirds. Unfortunately we managed to only get one properly dressed — as in wearing an Adidas swim brief! Mr. Board Shorts says his private parts simply couldn’t fit into any of our suits!

Speedos off at twinkz-deillustrated.tumblr.com
Track us at twinkz-illustrated.com

Read more

There aren’t enough green suits in this world. 

Read more